Solving Chaos and Anger Management Through Mindful Living
Mindfulness Can Help Those Afflicted with Anger Issues
Far too often, we tend to think of anger as an emotion that we shouldn’t have. But anger is simply an emotion. It’s what you do with that anger than can become something that it shouldn’t be.
If you get angry and lash out physically at someone, that’s the kind of anger that’s harmful. But healthy, non-violent anger is a tool that everyone has that can help their life to be better.
For example, if there’s injustice in your life, anger toward the situation will often motivate you to make changes to put a stop to the injustice. It can help be a motivating factor that can benefit your life.
However, if you struggle with anger and you know that it’s a problem, then mindfulness can help you to deal with the issues that trigger the anger. For everyone that experiences anger, there are emotional or physical triggers.
When you’ve worked hard all day only to find that the tasks you asked your kids or spouse to handle were blown off, that can be a trigger to cause anger. It’s hard to work all day and then have to come home and take care of more responsibilities.
You can stop anger by focusing on what you’re feeling in reaction to that trigger. Typically, your stomach will tighten, and you’ll tense up all over—to release these physical symptoms, practice mindful breathing.
Here’s how:
Study Your Anger
Why are you angry? What makes you angry? Is it often? Write it all down.
Usually, we don’t even realize we’re angry until we punched someone in the face or we already threw our iPhone 7. But if you know the situations that trigger your anger, you can avoid them or prepare yourself.
You want to take note of the signs your body is giving you that a rage-attack is forthcoming. Here are the questions you need to answer.
What physical things happen to you when you get angry? Does your heart pound? Breathing gets shallow? Do you feel hot?
What thoughts usually go through your head? “This isn’t fair” or “I wanna kill him/her” or “This shouldn’t have happened”?
What behaviors do you engage in? Do you raise your voice? Clench your fists? Throw everything that’s within your reach? Hurt them physically?
Avoid Triggers
Some say that social media makes them angry, and then they go and still spending most of their time on social media.
Yes, it is hard to avoid most of the triggers especially if they are something that you can’t avoid in everyday life—like work or traffic. But you can do something about it.
You can’t avoid traffic, but you can do something while on the traffic. Maybe listen to some music, read books/e-books or watch something on your phone.
You cannot avoid your co-workers/boss, or fire them unless you own the company, but you can focus more on doing the work and be busy.
But how do you actually become better at dealing with anger when it does hit you?
Train Your Mind Through Mindful Thinking
Breathe in and out slowly with deep breaths for the count of five. Picture the breath entering and leaving your body. Delve into the thoughts that are fueling your anger.
Most of the thoughts that drive anger center around things like you feel you’re being taken advantage of or you get tired of thinking no one is listening and you’re having to deal with the same issues over and over again.
Use mindfulness to examine these thoughts non-judgmentally and one by one, release these thoughts. Pay attention to how anger is affecting you physically.
This mindfulness can help you see how the anger is hurting you. The anger will calm as you focus on the breathing and letting the thoughts of why you’re angry clear away.
Act on What Makes You Angry
Once you’re no longer as angry as you were when your emotions were first triggered, use a mindful means of talking to the other person about what you feel. Make sure that you keep in mind the other person’s feelings.
What they did, didn’t do, said or didn’t say may have been completely unintentional. Discuss the situation calmly and be on the lookout for communication means that add to the anger.
Some of these are things like thinking negatively about the other person while you’re talking to them or assuming that they know exactly why you’re angry and just don’t care.
Mindfulness can help you to not place the blame on anyone when you’re communicating. Anger is an emotion that belongs to the person it rises up within. No one has the power to make you feel anger if you don’t want to and mindfulness can help you to control it within yourself.
From Chaos to Calm – How Mindfulness Lets You Be in Charge
There’s no denying that having chaos in your life is going to happen. It might not be a constant, but it will happen. When disorder does occur, some people run around in a state of anxiety or panic.
They don’t know what to do and how to calm the chaos. Regardless of what type of mess you’ve experienced or are going through now, mindfulness can help. It lets you be in charge and not your emotions or your thoughts.
What happens when chaos hits are that the outward or inward situation isn’t taking place in the present. The chaos is because of what might have happened or what’s going to happen as a result of this chaos.
When you experience turmoil, your stress levels will skyrocket. When that happens, it can be difficult to keep calm. Your mind will start to race, and the negative emotions will spring up, multiplying one after another.
Chaos causes you to become distanced from peace.
It hijacks your thoughts and pummels your emotions. But when you practice mindfulness, it doesn’t give in to the chaos.
Instead, mindfulness allows you to have peace and focus despite the physical or emotional storm you might be caught up in. It keeps you focused on the present and anchors your thoughts and emotions.
This helps you feel at rest even when you’re not. It bolsters your sense of purpose and ability to make decisions. Mindfulness calms the anxiety and lets you be in charge of what you need to take care of.
During the turmoil, your mind gets an influx of negative thoughts and when someone doesn’t practice mindfulness, those thoughts then cause the emotions to become more intense.
Mindfulness doesn’t stop the negative emotions from coming, but it helps you to be in charge of what’s going on in your mind and with your emotions because it lets you corral the thoughts that are trying to stampede.
It brings the wayward emotions back to the present and floods your mind with peace and purpose. Mindfulness brings a peace to the negative emotions and thoughts so that you’ll be aware of them, but they won’t control you.
When chaos happens, most people end up being controlled by their emotions, by the anxiety and turmoil they feel. But mindfulness will allow you to take a pause, view the situation and be able to make decisions that are based on reality rather than hyped-up feelings.
Mindfulness will allow you to keep order in your thoughts and emotions even when everything around you is in crisis. Being mindful will help to give you space to be able to keep yourself at peace.
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